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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Infant Death

 Sometimes in life we have to deal with things that just shouldn't be, like infant death. Here's the contents of an email I sent a friend, she had a friend who's baby was dying. These resources are neat things, that if we know about, we can share and help our friends during such awful times. Hopefully they will help someone out there too.

"I am so sorry to hear about your friend's baby. That's such heartbreaking news. I want to share some resources with you that I've found...maybe it can make this time a more memorable experience. You decide...but I'd talk openly with them about various options, see what they might like.

1) Hand/feet casting. There has got to be someone in your area that does it. This is such a memory. It captures every single little line in their hands, every jagged nail. Maybe a set for grandparents too...etc. When Elias was in the hospital, it was Chawna who thought of this, paid for the lady to come to the hospital and do it there....we thought for sure we'd be losing him. Check with local attachment parenting loops etc, midwives etc for resources

2) There are companies that can come out to the hospital when you know the time is near...or after the fact. They will take beautiful photos of the family, and the little one...they retouch them and make them all beautiful. List of TX ones Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep

3) Bereavement Gowns. Something to think about now. This link has various sites and also patterns to show you how to make one
Baby Bereavement Gowns
Heaven Sent Baby-Burial Gowns
Heavenly Angels In Need

4) This's so sad, but so celebrate every day we have with our kids. The 99 Balloons Video

5) This blog...a mom of a little girl with trisomy's also sad..but the mom shares a lot of good stuff...and just wrote a book about her journey with grief. When it comes out, it should be a good read. These are people, like your friend, who know ahead of time that they have precious little time with their baby.

6) Meals. Chawna uses this place in Dallas thats pretty cheap. You can go in and make meals to freeze, or they can make get a bunch that you pick for a certain price. Freeze and then when you're not up to cooking you just defrost and voila. Look nearby for freezer meals, or pre-made meals. That would be a great present.

Some Additional Resources:

Resources donate breastmilk, find unique headstones, etc etc Infant Loss Organizations

MEND: Mommies Enduring Neonatal Death

Caring Hearts at Presbyterian Hospital of Dallas Bereavement support for parents, 214/345-2613  "

This was an email directed to my friend in TX. While those local links may not help you, rest assured there are plenty of organizations out there by you that can lend assistance.  If you need help researching, send me an email, I'd be glad to help you find something. Just leave a comment with your need.

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